My Valentines Night

My Valentines night started when my boyfriend picked me up around 7:45pm to go eat. I was already dressed up waiting for him. When I sat down in the car, he surprised me with a box of chocolate and a pink teddy bear. I wanted to try this Brazilian steakhouse, so my boyfriend and I were on our way there, but things became sour shortly after I got in the car after my boyfriend said something. He said how these occasions made him nervous, and going out to eat made him nervous because he knew he wasn't romantic and he knew that I would be complaining afterwards. When I heard him say that, I was unhappy and my mood just changed. Valentines day is a special day where couples go out to eat somewhere special, give cute gifts of affection. What is there to be nervous about? It felt like he blamed me for putting him through this. If he didn't me, then I'm sure there are other women out there who thinks valentines day is an important day to celebrate the day for lovers. I tried to remain calm, and chose not to talk to him. Then I realized how sad he looks, so I grabbed his hands and told him to not be nervous because I will still love him. Then another round of disappointment came when he got to the restaurant. My boyfriend just sat in the car thinking whether we should eat there for a few minutes when he could have just taken a number and think later. I really wanted to go eat at that place because I heard it was good, but my boyfriend said to eat somewhere else. We went to Outback Steakhouse to eat, and we waited for about 45 minutes until it was our turn. During that whole time, I don't know why I started to feel sad that this Valentines day was beginning to go downhill. I felt like my boyfriend couldn't for once planned something special for us. I felt just as horrible as our first valentines together. When we were eating, I didn't feel like talking with my boyfriend much because I was really unhappy. He didn't want to take me to Amy's to pick up my strawberries I had pre order. I didn't tell him I had pre order strawberries, but I did tell him that I wanted to pick something up. He didn't give me the camera that I have been waiting and begging for. It didn't even cost much, but my boyfriend always complain that it's too much money. I wished he would have given me something better than those chocolate that I never eat. My sister's fiancée gave her a pair of dangling Tiffany's earrings, and when I saw that, I envied her. I wished my boyfriend would buy me the things I want. I guess that was part of the reason I was unhappy because I saw how nice my sister's fiancée treats her, and here my boyfriend won't even buy for me a $70 camera. I don't understand why my boyfriend has  become rather stingy towards me. Then last night I told him if he can use the money he kept from me to buy me that camera, so I can still show off to my sisters, but he didn't reply back.

I shouldn't have expected so much from my boyfriend, a person who doesn't know how to be romantic, and a person who acts like a grandpa in a young body. I know that I said I will not expect much from my boyfriend, but I just wanted a nice and romantic valentines and to receive the gifts I want. When my boyfriend took me home, I didn't even take the chocolate and bear he gave me. I told him that it was ok. I didn't want those things. I don't like that chocolate and I don't like bears. It will just go into the dumpster like the flowers he had bought for me on the first valentines, so it's better that he just keep it. After sleeping on it, I realized what I have done may have pushed the boundaries a little too much. So early this morning I texted my boyfriend to apologize to him for my selfishness act. I told him if he forgives me, then please text me back and if he didn't, then I know he's still mad at me. However, I get a feeling that he won't reply back to me and I know that today he will ask to be alone. I know my boyfriend well, and I know that he is hurt and unhappy with how I've treated him, and not taken his gifts. Well, if he doesn't want to see me today, then I guess I deserves it. I should have been thankful that he took the time to take me out to eat. I should have appreciated his goodwill, but I was mad for waiting and not getting the gift I wanted. I guess this weekend we won't hang out, but maybe he will feel better next week to hang out with me.